Feeling Alone

For quite some time now, I’ve been pretty happy and unhappy at the same time. I’ve been feeling really bored with life and at 15, that kind of scares me. I just feel like there’s no adventure in my life. I can’t really do much because my parents are over-protective. I sit in my room, watch Netflix, or read on my phone. That is all I ever do. The same routine is something I’ve grown so used to that it’s become boring. On top of all that, I’ve been feeling really alone. I usually feel alone and I’ve chalked it up to being 15 and a Freshman. I can’t honestly say that I have a lot of friends. I can’t honestly say that I have someone to tell all my secrets to and have fun with. And I can’t honestly say that I feel like I belong somewhere. All that is so scary. I know that all of this is just temporary, but it doesn’t mean that I’m not sad about it all. I just really wish that I had a real best friend. Maybe next year.

I’ve been so annoyed with my family lately. I feel really guilty about it and keep reminding myself that I’m lucky to have a full family and should be grateful for it. They’re all just so inconsiderate about how I’m feeling and what I want. I just can’t help but feel alone in my family, also. I’m not close with any member of my family. I used to be close with my two younger brothers but they’re growing up and their attitudes are rapidly changing.

I feel alone in everything that I do. Everything is just so scrambled up in my head, and I don’t know what to do about it all. I find myself staying in my room all day and then feeling really really sad. Once I sit around by other people for a little bit, I start to feel better and then go right back to sitting in my room.

I think that’s all I want to say for now. To anyone reading this, don’t worry about me. I really am fine. I have my head on straight, and as long as I have myself, I’ll be okay. Thank you for letting me vent. The word document is kind of the only way I can talk in a very weird, sad kind of way (lol).

Love,

Sammy’s Space

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